From my course “The Mystic’s Academy”
I am Yoda, and I Quit
I resign from giving unwanted advice
I’m a bit intense and I love giving advice to people. Some people think I’m a megalomaniac, a narcissist, a know-it-all, or someone that’s really just very self-involved.
I can understand why they think that way, but I know it’s just not so.
I can be a bit obnoxious at times, maybe pushy, maybe a bit invasive, but honestly, I am just trying to help.
You see, I have a number of mentors. These are very accomplished people. One is a mathematician with very high social intelligence. Another is a psychotherapist. The third is a respected teacher of Zen.
I called each of them up now and then and occasionally say to them…
“Do you think I’m mentally ill? do you think I’m a narcissist?”
They answer firmly “No”. They often add, “actually you’re brilliant, generous, a great intuitive and critical thinker, and most of the time you’re right.”
Concerning the “accusation” that I need to be right all the time.
When I give someone opinion I know I’m right most of the time. This doesn’t come from arrogance, or some self-involved elitist notion.
I’m not right because I think I’m right. Before I give someone my opinion concerning anything opinion, I tend to run it past four or five other people, many of whom are experts on the subject.
Very often I’m told I’m wrong. By the time I share that information with the person asking me the question, I’ve already had four or five other people discuss my ideas with me and give me the answer. Sometimes I’m right and sometimes I’m shown to be wrong through these “dialogues”. I don’t share my opinion unless I’ve run it through this filter.
In a sense, I’m very collaborative concerning facts, critical thinking, and determining what is and what is not so.
Often I feel like the head of a mission impossible Team without the Tom Cruise personality or the violence.
This is not just a hobby for me. I research data points, separating what seems “so” from what is actually so.
It happens that I give advice professionally. I have a company called AskLewis.com — People call me up or email me and ask me questions about quantum physics, hypnosis, neurobiology, personal growth, Lucid Dreaming, Astral Projection, Russia and Ukraine, and even data points about Gaza, Israel, the Republican Party, the Democratic Party, Trump-Biden, the economy, philosophy, history, etc.
I give them solid answers. This is what I do.
Maybe I’m Co-dependent
I think they may be a little bit of codependency in my personality. You see, I am a bit of an empath, meaning I feel the suffering of other people. Because of this, I have a need to help others avoid suffering, even when they haven’t asked for that support.
Doing this has created a few problems for me. People I seek to help may feel I am being invasive. They are convinced I’m trying to run their lives. Yet, what I’m really looking to do is save them from their poor decisions.
I surrender! I’m not resigning, I’m just surrendering.
I’m a student of Taoism and the teacher who wrote the Tao te Ching, Lao Tzu also surrendered this “unwanted advice game”.
Lao has been an archivist for the emperor, and got sick and tired of trying to help people that didn’t want to be helped.
In the end, he just disappeared, went to a mountain (a gated community sort of place) with a security guard (gatekeeper) gave that guy the Tao te Ching (The gatekeeper asked for it) and just plain disappeared.
So, that’s pretty much what I’m going to do. I’m no longer using my cell phone unless I absolutely must. You won’t be able to call me really can’t call me, though you will be able to reach me through Messenger on Facebook, or send me an email. Maybe we can do a ZOOM call. Send m a ZOOM invite!
You can call my wife if you have her phone number. She’ll give me the message.
The Takeaway
· I am not going to present any opinion publically unless I must.
· I’m no longer giving advice to people that don’t ask for it even I know they need it.
· In a rare instance I may ask them permission to give them advice and as soon as I get resistance I will stop.
This is my new approach to life and people.
· My life worked out very nicely. I live simply, get regular steam baths and massage. I meditate, do yoga, some Tai Chi and Aikido.
· I have a great support system, mentors, friends and such.
· I live by a beach, eat well and l have a great marriage.
I have my issues as we all do. Yet, work through issues (one of which is fear of rejection and a little bit of discomfort over heights). I do pretty well with the students that want me to help them. I help them and the people who aren’t interested I wish them well.
I am also very lucky, yet I do believe in the aphorism, “The smarter you are, the luckier you get!”
——————————————
This story is an excerpt from my course “The Mystic’ Academy”
——————————————
©Lewis Harrison, all rights reserved.
——————————————
Before you go…
I am Lewis Harrison, a successful entrepreneur, and advisor to philanthropists. I am also the award-winning author of over twenty books on business, leadership, personal growth, and strategic thinking. I offer programs, courses, and coaching. I also teach seminars and speak on living the spiritual life, personal development and life strategies. Reach out to me at askLewis.com
Grab your FREE copy of my short e-book, filled with action packed tips for self-improvement and personal growth. “Join my group of 18,000 influencers”.